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Practice Writing: Write Essay ID: #34050 jobs55
Instructions

There are more men or women in certain jobs and there’s nothing we can change about it. Do you agree with that?

* Write your essay below (between 200 and 300 words)

With a free account: Retry and compare every attempt.
Model Answer Perfect answer
There are more men or women in certain jobs and there’s nothing we can change about it. Do you agree with that?
Highlights
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In many labour markets, some occupations are dominated by men while others attract mainly women. Although biological differences exist, the claim that nothing can be changed about such patterns is unconvincing. I strongly disagree, because job segregation is largely shaped by social structures, education, and organisational procedures that can be reformed.

The strongest reason is that early socialization and access to education influence career choices more than innate ability. When children repeatedly see engineering presented as masculine and care work as feminine, preferences are narrowed artificially. However, targeted schooling policies, visible role models, and balanced career guidance have already increased female participation in science and male entry into nursing, demonstrating that behaviour responds to intervention.

A further argument against inevitability concerns workplace conditions and recruitment norms. Long hours, inflexible schedules, and biassed hiring panels discourage capable candidates of the underrepresented gender. Once organisations redesign roles, normalise parental leave for both sexes, and assess applicants through unbiassed criteria, gender balance improves, as shown in firms that have diversified management and technical teams without reducing performance.

In conclusion, unequal representation in certain jobs is not a fixed reality but a changeable outcome of policy and practice. By reshaping education, recruitment, and working conditions, societies can widen participation across genders. Therefore, the view that nothing can be changed ignores clear evidence that deliberate action can transform occupational patterns.

225 words
26/ 26
Perfect answerPTE Academic · Write Essay
Tap a highlighted sentence to see why it scores
PTE criteria · full marks
  • Fully addresses the prompt in depth, showing full command of the argument by reformulating the issue in the writer's own words and expanding important points with specificity.
  • The argument is supported convincingly with subsidiary points and relevant examples throughout the response.
How this answer meets itThe writer strongly disagrees that job segregation by gender cannot be changed. A real example about policies raising female science entry supports this view. I strongly disagree, because job segregation is largely shaped by social structurestargeted schooling policies, visible role models, and balanced career guidance have already increased female participation in science
PTE criteria · full marks
  • Has an effective logical structure, flows smoothly, and can be followed with ease.
  • The argument is clear and cohesive and developed systematically at length; a well-developed introduction and conclusion are present, and ideas are organised cohesively into clear, logically sequenced paragraphs.
  • Uses a variety of connective devices effectively and consistently to convey relationships between ideas.
How this answer meets itThe ideas are sequenced clearly and each paragraph opens with a strong linker. These connectors guide the reader through the argument. The strongest reasonHowever, targeted schooling policiesA further argumentThereforeIn conclusion
PTE criteria · full marks
  • A variety of expressions and vocabulary are used appropriately to formulate ideas with ease and precision throughout the response.
  • No signs of limitations restricting what can be communicated.
  • Errors in language use, if present, are rare and minor, and meaning is completely clear.
How this answer meets itThe writer uses varied structures with ease, including a clause showing time and condition. Meaning stays completely clear. When children repeatedly see engineering presented as masculine and care work as feminine, preferences are narrowed artificiallyOnce organisations redesign roles, normalise parental leave for both sexes, and assess applicants through unbiassed criteria, gender balance improves
PTE criteria · full marks
  • Shows consistent grammatical control of complex language. Errors are rare and difficult to spot.
How this answer meets itComplex sentences are consistently accurate and errors are rare. This comparative construction is built correctly. early socialization and access to education influence career choices more than innate ability
PTE criteria · full marks
  • Good command of a broad lexical repertoire, idiomatic expressions and collocations.
How this answer meets itThe essay uses precise academic words and strong collocations. These choices sound confident and exact. organisational proceduresrecruitment normsunderrepresented genderoccupational patterns
PTE criteria · full marks
  • Correct spelling.
How this answer meets itSpelling is correct, including these longer words. unconvincingintervention
PTE criteria · full marks
  • Length is within the required 200 to 300 words.
How this answer meets itThe essay is 225 words, which is within the required range. It is a clear four-paragraph essay with an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
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