Fundamentally, the blackmailer is entitled. They believe that others are responsible for their feelings. They believe others must act in a way that makes them feel good, rather than taking responsibility for their own feelings. Oh, that actually makes a lot of sense. What about the person who lets themselves be blackmailed? Why do they allow that the blackmailer refuses to take responsibility for their own feelings, but the blackmailee is the exact opposite: they take responsibility for feelings that aren’t their own. While the blackmailer wants everyone around them to act a certain way, the blackmailee wants everyone to feel a certain way. While the blackmailer feels entitled, the blackmailee feels like they owe a debt. While the blackmailer passes judgements, the blackmailee is always looking to be positively judged. They take the judgments of other people very seriously. If someone says to them, “you’re a very selfish person,” they believe it immediately. They think, am I selfish? I must be selfish! Why would someone say that if I wasn’t? Oh god, I’m such a bad person. I need to fix this right now. While the blackmailer wants everyone to serve them, the blackmailee wants to serve everyone. They wanna be liked and approved by everyone, and they’ll do just about anything to get it. While the blackmailer believes what they say is the truth.